This is not academic writing 學術文章不是這麼寫的

並非所有與學術議題相關的文章,就能稱之為「學術文章」。本篇專欄將節錄不同學術議題的內容,分析常見的寫作錯誤,並分享潤修與寫作的技巧。
Not all articles written on academic topics are written in proper academic English. In this "This is not academic writing" column we examine short excerpts from academic texts to illustrate common writing errors and explain how to correct them.

Unacceptable 不被認可的文章

“Most foodstuff eaten by mankind originates in plants. Fruits and vegetables and grains contain nutrients that have been drawn from the soil and turned into edible roots and stems and leaves in a process powered by the sun. Plants’ first-rank importance in nutrition gives them such an important role in human life that plant scientists always are important in university and corporate research centers. Botanists investigate how to improve the productive life of a food-bearing plant and how to slow the growth of weeds. All living things benefit from this important work.”

This exploration of plants as a source of life and a focus of research is slack in its execution. Language is not taut and thinking is sloppy. Using “foodstuff” instead of “food” is evidence of both failings. “Important” or a variation of it recurs with numbing regularity. The writer seems averse to commas—“fruits and vegetables and grains” and “roots and stems and leaves…” And botanists don’t try to “slow” weed growth; they work to stop it. From beginning to end, the writer is guilty of hasty writing and thinking. A final example is in the final sentence: “All living things benefit” from botanists’ work? Tell that to the weeds. What else do you see?
這段文章討論植物作為生命來源與研究領域,但寫作不力,遣詞用字草率,思慮也不夠嚴謹。用 “foodstuff” 取代 “food” 就同時有語言和思慮的瑕疵,“important” 與種種類似的詞彙一再出現,略顯麻木單調。作者好像不太喜歡用逗號,從 “fruits and vegetables and grains” 與 “roots and stems and leaves…” 這兩句就看得出來。另外,植物學家不會 “slow”(延緩)雜草生長,應該是遏止雜草生長。自始至終,作者的文筆和想法都很馬虎,最後一個錯誤出現在最後一句 -植物學家的工作 “all living things benefit”(裨益所有生命)?這種話連雜草也不會信。你還看到其他問題嗎?

Acceptable 認可的文章

“Most foods consumed by human beings originate in plant life. Fruits, vegetables, grains—they are the source of nutrients that have been drawn from the soil and reconstructed as edible organisms in a process powered by the sun. This primacy in nutrition gives plants such an important role in human existence that plant scientists are in constant demand in university and corporate research centers. There, botanists explore how to enhance the productive life of a food-bearing plant and how to discourage growth of weeds. All animal life benefits from this work.”


Posted at 2012-02-24 16:20:05

0 Response to This is not academic writing 學術文章不是這麼寫的

請登入才能留言